A few weeks ago Aaron and I attended the funeral of a friend of ours from when we first started in ministry 10 years ago. Michael died unexpectedly and left behind his wife and daughter. His funeral was awfully sad, but at the same time a wonderful celebration of a man who lived a life that counted for something. At one point the pastor asked anyone that had come to know Jesus through Michael's ministry to stand. It was amazing. Then he asked anyone that was married by Michael to stand. Still more. He asked if you are in the ministry today because of Michael's leadership and encouragement to stand. By the end of this there were very few people still sitting. It was a great display of the life that Michael lived.
During the funeral I kept finding myself looking at his wife Kim as she sat through the funeral of her husband at such a young age. I hurt so badly for her. One day all was well, and the next day she was a widow and single mom of a seven year old girl. Life should not go this way. It is not fair.
At one point my mind began to go places it shouldn't ever go. I began to see myself in her spot and Aaron in that casket. I wondered in my head all the “what if's” that could possibly happen. I mean if it can happen to Kim, why not me. We are all at risk here to losing the one we love at any moment. My stomach began to hurt at the pain of losing Aaron. I don't know how I would go on. Life would be so grey and lonely. I would feel as though I couldn't go on.
Things like this are constant reminders that we only get one shot at this thing called life. I only get one shot at parenting my kids. I only get one shot at loving my husband well. I only get one shot at being 32. I only get one shot at loving these neighbors. At any point it can all be taken from us. I don't want anything to be taken from me, but I know that if and when it is I will have the true comforter to get me through. I will have the strength and power of my Savior Jesus to get me through.
I'm will forever be praying for my friends Kim and Erin as they now venture through this life alone. God is still good and is still in charge. He will be sustain them.
*An old picture of our family, but one I want to remember forever.
I recently learned that Philippians 4:13 isn’t supposed to be “I can do anything” rather “I can do without everything and still be content in Christ”. Your post reminded me of that. Praying for your friend.
So true, Jamie. It’s not a good place for our minds to stay…but, speaking from life experience, the Comforter and Healer truly gives beauty for ashes. My life is a testimony of that love, grace, healing, & beauty! The grief journey isn’t pretty , but the story He writes is beautiful! It’s not something I would wish for anyone. But…I wouldn’t trade the experiences because it is part of my story and who I am today.
Shaunna – thanks for sharing. I know you know about this more than anything. 🙂
thanks so much for sharing. this is so so true. lifting up your friend and her daughter to the Lord. praying for the comfort only He can give.