A month ago on December 14th, some awful things happened. #1 there was a school shooting in CT that has gone down as the worst school shooting in history. I'm pissed that we even have a category for this. That there is even a worst school shooting means that there are more than one, and that angers me and longs for a day when there is no more evil in this world. #2 Sara had her stroke. I don't know Sara, but I know lots of her friends and so I've been following her progress. On this day lives were changed forever. Parents lots their children. Children lost their mom. Kids saw their mom head to hospital. A rough day.
This weekend I was getting ready to go somewhere and Deacon ran in and asked if I would come scare him and Amos in their room. I was busy blow drying my hair, and so I couldn't. He ran back in after a few minutes and begged me to come in and scare them. I stopped what I was doing and asked a few questions about what they were playing.
Me: What game are you guys playing?
Deacon: We have our teddy bears set up like they are the kids and we are at school.
Me: Awesome, what do you need me for?
Deacon: We are practicing our drill for school.
Me: (kinda having an idea of what is going on here) What kind of drill?
Deacon: If a person comes in our school that isn't supposed to be there and they have a gun, it's what we do. If all the kids are in the room we put a sign up and if someones not there we put a different sign up.
Me: (trying not to cry at the fact that I'm having this conversation with my son) So, what do you need from me?
Deacon: We want you to come scare us and act like you are the person at school with a gun.
Me: Oh … let's go and talk to daddy about this game.
My heart was broken. The fact that my kids even know about this and they are seven breakes my heart. They are way too young to have this burden on them. My only saving thought was that Deacon and Amos didn't even see the gravity of this drill or the game they were playing. They had no clue.
So, today I'm saddened for the families that have gone a month without their kids at the dinner table. I'm saddened for the town in CT that is trying to recover from a massive shooting. I'm saddened for the kids whose mom is now in Houston undergoing extensive therapy to get better.
I'm also grateful for a hope that surpasses all of this sadness. I do not put my hope in things of this world, but yet in God who is bigger than anything that went down on December 14th, 2012.
“Sing praises to the LORD, O you his saints, and give thanks to his holy name. For his anger is but for a moment, and his favor is for a lifetime. Weeping may tarry the night, but joy comes with the morning.” Psalm 30:4-5
Lots of people wrote some good stuff about these events. Check them out here;
Jillian Lauren: Invisible Hurts
Jennie Allen: When It Feels Like God Forgot
Kristen Howerton: The Inconvenient Truth About Gun Control and Mental Health
Angie Smith: The Brown House
Lara Williams: Ride the Waves of Grief
Missy: December 14
Jen Hatmaker: Lamentations
Big Mama: In Search of the Light
Fabs Harford: Thoughts and Prayers for Connecticut
Break my heart. One month seems like so long and no time at all. In some ways I am grateful that my kids aren’t in school yet, so they are still sheltered from knowing anything about this tragedy. But yet I am so, so sad for how it will change their lives once they start school.
And those families. Makes me cry just thinking about them.
To add to the conversation, here are some words my husband wrote in order to make sense of the tragedy while maintaining a Christ-centered worldview.