There is not a night that goes by that I don't check my email just one … two … three … fifteen more times before I go to bed JUST IN CASE the email I want to be there is there.
obsessive email checks
by jamieivey | Apr 22, 2009 | My Story | 7 comments
7 Comments
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This post describes exactly what I’m doing exactly at this moment! We’ve been in IBESR for six months waiting for Presidential Dispensation (for having four bio kids) and going crazy. Our baby girl is constantly on my mind, and every time I walk by my computer I HAVE to check my email. I’m told it could be seven or more months just waiting for that piece of paper, so why I have to check email every hour I don’t know. You’re right – it feels like there is “no reason” for all the delays and it doesn’t make sense. I’m glad God is in control, because it’s clear that no one else is. Anyway, I appreciate your post. It’s what I needed to read tonight, so thanks! I hear a bunch of files are about ready to be released from MOI. I hope one of those is yours!
I have struggled every day with this 27 month long adoption journey. We never caught a break and went quickly through any stage and now that our visa appointment is/was this morning, I am still fearful that something, anything can go wrong and derail this dream. It always killed me when I spent over 8 months in IBESR and then watched someone speed through in 2 months. All I know is that I still am sitting here with a lump in my stomach, checking my email every few minutes for news the LAST hurdle is over and behind us, and that we can make our travel plans to bring our boys home. I won’t feel relieved until our boys are with us on the plane heading home to the states.
Jamie, I know how you feel. (I don’t know if you remeber me but my twin girls are also at RHFH). I almost obsess more over getting that “email or phone call” as much as I pray. On somedays I do check my email more. Just being honest. I just can’t concentrate on anything else for very long. Don’t get me wrong. I feel a part of me is missing.
I was wondering where your first response Janelle got her info about a bunch of files in MOI being released. That is very exciting. I
Praying for all of you,
Kristy
Sorry I didn’t make much sense there, I told you I can’t concentrate:)
Kristy
I spent the last two months of our first adoption in total misery because of that “why not us?/why them?” mode. It’s terrible. And for me, not only was I miserable because other family’s were bypassing us, I felt guilty for being such a selfish person that I was literally in tears over someone else’s joy. It was yucky. Try hard to run fast when you feel those thoughts coming on; it will make you crazy!
WOW! Exactly how I feel except I’m only in IBESR!!! Yours is one of the blogs I go to when I’m bored, frustrated, disappointed… I think because I’m hoping that even if I didn’t get my good news today, then hopefully someone else did! I go to several other people’s blogs that I don’t know just praying & hoping for all of us who although we have never met in person, but we have the same God-given bond with a beautiful child of Haiti. May God give us all the patience, strength & comfort we need & our children need!
Story of my life, ladies. I’m glad we are not in this alone. I can relate to all of these feelings. We are coming up on two years this summer. My checking obsession is like a roller coaster that I need to stay away from! Should we start a 12-step group?? 🙂