Yesterday I had a conversation with one of my boys that I'm sure is the beginning of many more to come. He was a little timid in talking with me about it, but he had already talked to Aaron about it and I think he just wanted to get it off his chest. He finally told me.
He likes a girl.
Oh my heart skipped a few beats because I'm not ready for this at all. He has said this to me before, but it was pretty flippant and this time seemed more sincere. I want to live in that world where my boys only love me and then around 25 they find a girl they love, they date and then get married. Easy. No one ever gets their heart broken. No one ever does anything stupid. I want my kids to have it easy with love.
As he began to talk to me, I was in such a hurry because we had friends coming over, but I stopped everything and just listened. He is smitten over a girl and it is so cute. I asked him what it makes him feel like when he thinks of her, and his answer has still blown me away. He said when he thinks of her it makes him want to sing. To sing. My boy is a romantic.
I had to fight all that was in me to not look him straight in the eyes and tell him that this is silly. You are way to young. You don't even know what it feels like to truly like someone. Go to bed and stop talking about this nonsense.
But I didn't, and I won't ever belittle my kids feelings for someone else. I need to remember my days of thinking I was in love with the man of my dreams in 3rd grade and 9th grade. In my 9 year old heart it wasn't love, but it was a feeling I had never experienced. Instead of ignoring his words to me, I want to be there to listen and to guide him. I want to be able to speak wisdom into his little heart. For the love he's begging for it and he doesn't even know it. He's talking to me about a girl that he has a crush on. I won't take that for granted or take it lightly.
At the very end he told me that he has written her a poem and was going to give it to her anonymously tomorrow. I took the poem so that I could show Aaron and also take a picture of it, because I need to document this because it is just too precious. I told Aaron I was s little apprehensive about letting him give it to her, because what if it freaked her parents out, or the teacher was upset. We decided that we need to let him because it's harmless and he's expressing feelings for someone. In a very romantic way I might add. My boy has a way with his words. He's gonna be a charmer I think.
So, today I wait for him to get out of school and pray to God that I don't pick him up and he's devastated because someone made fun of him, or she knows it's him and tells everyone, or some friends find out and pick on him. Oh I want my baby's heart to be protected. I guess this is the part of parenting that I hate. Sitting back and watching your kids live.
{Update … he didn't get to give it to her, but he's thinking about giving it to her next week. Also please don't mention this to him if you read this and know him. I was hesitant about blogging about it, but for the love when he's 25 I need this memory for him. It's just too precious. And I need to be able to show him his first love poem. }
This entry is a part of #7in7. For more writers that are doing this, visit Fab's blog.
This is hilariously cute & adorable.. And I can’t believe our kids are getting to this age! Precious.
I think this is precious, and when he does find the woman he is going to marry she is going to be one lucky lady. She will know how he feels. LOVE it!
Oh my word! As a teacher who tries to get her kids to write with description and precision I’m impressed. As a girl I would melt – so sweet. You are right – he’s going to be a charmer, and a hopefully writer of some kind! Please keep us updated if he’s able to give it to her … I don’t want to embarrass him, but I am dying to know how this plays out. And I’m sincerely praying for his heart to not be crushed…this is such an amazing gesture and I pray it is received well.
Oh this is so precious, and yet, understandably terrifying for you! I love that you’re not belittling his feelings. When do we know as parents when feelings for someone else are “real”? I think by validating him in this, you’re certainly building trust for sharing these sorts of things when he’s older.
Oh my word, that is way too cute! I am loving that poem! Thanks for sharing this. I hope we get a follow-up soon!
I don’t have children of my own but I do have an “adopted young’un” who is quite devastatingly handsome and a total sweetheart. Girls have been enamored with him since he was a little thing, and I knew when he came of age that it would be something trying to keep them away. I got to experience a little bit of his teen crush experience one night, I had taken him to a football game while his mom was busy with his newborn brother (they are 13 years apart). He wanted me to take on of his friends (who happened to be a girl) so I obliged. They were great through the game and I could tell there was a bit of a spark there. On the way home I could see out of the corner of my eye he was leaned awfully far over to talk to her (he was in the front seat, she was in back). After we dropped her off, he confided to me “I held her hand. Like the whole way back. It was the first time I ever did that…..my hands were sweating.” I saw this little freckle faced boy that used to hold my hand walking across a parking lot beaming in the dark of my car. I made over it and told him that was a big deal! 🙂 It was just a precious moment that I would not change for anything. He said it was his best night ever!