Have I mentioned how much I hate packing. I seriously hate it so much. I not only don’t like to do it, I’m not very good at it. I have been told that I tend to hold on to things that I don’t need to hold on to. They don’t even have to be nice things, but stupid things like magazines. I have a hard time throwing them away. I always feel like I should give them away instead of throw them away, so I keep them. All my adoption magazines I save just in case there is something I need to go back and read one day. Stupid I know. I keep stuff that I don’t know what to do with. My knitting that I took up for one weekend a year ago and haven’t touched since then, yep I have a hard time giving it away. I mean what if one day I want to take up knitting again, and by take up I really mean, learn for the first time.
Staci has been coming over every week and helping me pack. Really she walks around bossing me around and telling me what to bring her while she takes over. It works. She knows how to pack, I don’t. She has made Aaron very happy. Each week he comes home to see all he has done and he smiles. I have maybe packed four boxes and she has the boxes she’s packed stacked so high in my dining room. I need her in my move!
I often get sidetracked when packing. I come across something that I don’t know what to do with. For example tonight I was going through stuff in Story’s room and found this at the bottom of a pile of baby dolls that she never plays with:
To you this seems like a normal ole stuffed animal. To me I see memories. I stopped and picked it up and remembered that this was the first gift I received after I found out I was pregnant with Cayden. My mom bought this for me. How could I possibly get rid of this? It holds memories for me. BUT it was at the bottom of a pile of toys that Story doesn’t play with. No one plays with it. No one ever has. Will my mom be offended if I she knew I gave it away? Am I throwing away memories if I give this to goodwill? Or, do I pack it, move it, try to find a new home for it and in another year find it under a kids bed and have this conversation with myself all over again?
I’m making big steps. I’m purging of stuff.
Mom, please forgive me but I’m giving your bear away. Some kid will be super happy to have it. I am not holding on to stuff that isn’t being used. I will not hoard. I will share.
(I’m trying to talk myself into believing that it’s okay to give this sweet, cute, sentimental bear away!!!!)