I tell Aaron all the time that there's one kid that I'm just always trying to figure out. Most of the time I'm not sure what he's thinking. He's quiet and introspective, and sometimes I wish I could crawl in his head and see what's happening in there. Deacon's my boy that makes me work for his love. Not really, but in my mind it feels like that. He is not one to talk my head off, which makes me feel loved, but instead he's a thinker, who out of no where will give me a huge hug and that's him saying “I love you mom”.
You see, I'm a talker. If I am feeling something I want to tell you about it, and I also want you to tell me about it. Sometimes when Aaron's out of town for a while, he'll get a text from me that says something like this: “Hey I know you love me, but if you could text me or send me a voxer telling me you love me and how much you love me and how much you miss me and how much your life sucks without me I'd love it”
So you can see where Deacon makes me fight for his love. He's not as vocal about his feelings, and that screams to me I-don't-know-if-I-even-love-you-mom when really he's probably just quietly thinking about what he wishes we could have for dinner and I'm interpreting his silence as not loving me.
Clearly I'm weird, I know this. No need to point it out.
I tell you all that so that you will see how much I loved it when out of the blue Deacon looks at me and says, “Mom, next week can just you and I hang out? Like can I take you out on a date or something?” Um. YES and YES and YES and YES. My heart could not have felt more love from him than in that exact moment. It's like my heart believed what my head already knows … you see Jamie he does love you. (I know I'm a bit dramatic. Aaron clearly knows this from the text I told you about above that he gets every single time he travels)
We picked a date, his daddy gave him some cash because he demanded to pay for this (what a gentleman we are raising here!), we picked a place and when that date arrived he was ready! He put on his favorite clothes, and I luckily had received a new Stitch Fix box that week, so I had a new dress for my date, and every girl loves a new dress for a date, right?!?
Cute new dress & cute new purse. All from Stitch Fix. Yes I'm still a fan of the box of clothes that shows up at my door every other month. Yes, please. Keep them coming! {If you want to check them out, go HERE and see what all the fun is about.}
Okay back to our date. I was in heaven, and I think Deacon was as well. I always say that he's our quiet one and doesn't get much of a word in around the dinner table at home. I mean he's going up against Cayden and Story, who could both talk to a wall and keep the conversation going for hours. While we were at dinner my sweet boy never stopped talking. We talked and we talked and we talked. It truly was one of my favorite nights of the entire Summer so far. We talked about what he's loving about life right now, and things that are hard for him. He told me funny stories, we laughed, and we even talked about gay marriage (I know, kinda deep, but it was a great time for me to share my thoughts on it with him). Deacon opened up on things that are hard between him and his brothers, and even things he's nervous about for fourth grade. We talked about things that matter, things we are feeling, things we are loving, and things that are hard.
We went to Contigo because well it's the best restaurant on our side of town, the people there love us, and it's a great date night even if it's a mom/son date night. We split a burger & fries, started with some duck fat goodness, and ended up with two desserts. One we ordered and one gifted to us from the restaurant. Which by the way, Deacon thought we were so special that they sent us a free dessert.
If you are a momma to lots of kids that are all around the same age like me, my advice to you is to get them one on one and see what happens. Pull them aside and listen. Let them talk. Deacon's the one that I feel like I'm always having to pull things out of him, and yet when we were alone he wouldn't stop talking. We had just the best time, and I can't wait for my next date night with one of my boys.
So, so sweet! Deacon looks so proud in every picture 🙂
So, so sweet! Deacon looks so proud in every picture 🙂 Also thanks for keeping it real with the texts you send Aaron – love that!
ha! keeping it real. tell me how much you love me!!! ha!
I’m not gonna lie this made me tear up a bit! As someone who hopes to adopt one day, I am thankful for your posts & these trailblazing mama moments. So sweet (and honest) I love it.
I just love this so much! I have been reading your blog for awhile and almost never leave comments (why is that???), but this was too sweet to not say anything. I grew up in a house with four kids and I know our parents struggled to keep up with us and all our activities and the demands of daily life, but my fondest memory of my childhood is when my mom took me out to dinner, just the two of us. It was relaxed and fun, and the fact that she chose to give me her undivided attention for a whole evening made me feel so loved. Thank you for sharing this story. You have a beautiful family!
so adorable! thanks for encouraging me to date my kiddos more! and your stitchfix was on point! love that dress and purse!
I am crying real tears from how sweet this is. It makes me excited to be a momma one day. I just started listening to your podcasts and I’m loving them.