I guess you could say that I'm a working mom now. Which just the phrase “working mom” is funny to me. As if I wasn't a working mom before, but you know what I mean. Now I'm a mom AND I work outside the home.
Today I started my 8th week of working at the radio station. Every week I hear someone ask me how I like it and how it is going. My answer is always the same. “It's going good.” “I like it.” blah blah blah! Truth be known it's going great. I really do enjoy it. I feel like I'm getting better and learning more day by day. The guys I work with have been great at teaching me “radio” stuff (whatever that means!) and being patient with my lack of knowledge about this whole new world I just entered. I'm feeling more confident each day and I truly have fun in there.
BUT … I would be lieing if I told you that I have it all figured out and that we have adjusted to this whole new life. I'm still figuring out how to do this new life that I have created. I miss my kids in the morning. I miss drinking coffee with Aaron while he cooks breakfast. I miss moving slowly in the morning with the kids. I miss talking to Cayden on the way to school. I miss morning workouts.
So these things I'm still figuring out. I usually get home around noon each day and have the whole rest of the day to be with the kids. How can you beat that? Working mom that's home by noon. Nice! I'm figuring out how to get the most out of my kids and husband each day. I try to nap each day, but sometimes that just makes things worse. I'm figuring out how to let things go that don't truly matter. I'm learning to be okay with someone else parenting my kids while I'm gone. I'm learning. I'm trusting. I'm growing.
So … I'm 8 weeks into my new gig. How long until I get in a groove? How long until I get this figured out? If you work outside the home, any tips about how to let things go and make the most of the time with your kids?
I am in the opposite position….was put on bedrest 32 weeks into my pregnancy last July and have been a stay at home mom since. After being home almost a year now with the kids, I still do not think I am totally used to it. I do miss my alone time in the morning– just listening to the radio and enjoying my 45 minute drive to work. Most people would see it as being stuck in rush hour traffic on Mopac. I saw it as a time to catch my breath and just have some thinking time.
I try to take advantage of my days at home because I know that in a few months to a year or a couple years (haven’t really decided) I will go back to work and really miss my time with the kids. I’ll go back to only seeing them after work…..rushing to get dinner on the table, homework completed and baths all taken.
Before staying home, I had these visions of the house being spotless, me baking cookies, having dinner ready when my husband came home, etc etc. But the reality is no matter how much I vacuum, the dog will still shed, water will still splash from the bathtub, and dirty dishes will still be waiting for me in the sink. The picture perfect Beaver’s home does not exist. So I have learned to be content with getting what I can done and spending as much time as I can with the kids. That’s what really matters in the end.
I’ve worked part-time from home for a bank for the last 8 years and then the last 2 months have been back full-time in the office half-time. Whew, did that make any sense? I suppose we started out journey about the same time. The two things I’ve gotten is 1- plan, plan, plan. Sitting down as a family for dinner has been my number one goal and I always have to think about it before the day of which is what I did when I worked from home full-time. And the other is what you said exactly – let go! I’m having to let go of some of the extra stuff I’m used to doing. Couponing is cut down, reading is cut down, TV is cut down, coffee dates are cut down. I’ve also been more diligent of having one-on-one time with the girls when before it was just everyone hanging out at the house type thing.
I’ll be coming back to see what everyone else says!
I have only been out of the home working since October. I have been home 6 years. I have learned to let go of all the “extras”, seeking the Lord first on that decision, I have let go of being the youth minister of my church, I”m currently letting go of being the bookkeeper as well. Mostly becuase my first ministry is my household. Raising my kids up! Being a good mom and wife when I am home, and I couldn’t do all of that and work too… I”m also a clean freak. So I just try and get one job done a day. At first I was killing myself trying to not only take care of my kids but then as soon as they went to bed cleaning, cleaning, cleaning. I have come to learn that it doesn’t really matter. The house being spotless isn’t really important. I needed me time too, even if that meant just sitting down on the couch with no one else around… So I took that after bed time, time, for me! I try and get the kids to help me straighten up one room before we go to bed, however with my special needs 6 yr old and my 2 yr old, that can be challenging too. I’m training them to clean up after themselves (now I know why my mom made us clean up after ourselves) I know as a stay at home mom, sometimes that was hard for me because I felt like it was just easier to do it myself. I can’t say that I have arrived either, and that I know all the tricks, but I know not being overwhelmed with the entire house or all that I have to do, and just trying to get one thing done every night makes a big difference. However the only thing aside from that one thing, is making sure I do one load of laundry all the way through, otherwise it starts to make babies and before I know it, it’s out of control!!! 🙂
Please let’s meet someday and be friends! I am feeling you- starting working around the same time we are getting our son in Rwanda- currently getting our son. If you can ever skip your nap and grab coffee let’s try.
From a gal that did mornings for a couple years … make sure to nap. Religiously. Wholeheartedly. Unabashedly.
Take Friday off. Because in our churchy world … Saturday is PMS (pre-message syndrome) and Sunday is a full out work day.
Take a morning off every now and again. Amazing what a slow morning will do for your soul.
You sound great, btw!
It’s tough to work outside the home and still be a full time mommy, wife, and find time for yourself. I’m blessed with a beyond fabulous husband who not only cleans and does laundry, but he actually enjoys time with his kids. I know you have a fantastic, supportive hubby too! So lean on him. I’ve worked since Rosa came home and I’m only just beginning to feel like we have some rhythm to the very fun chaos of raising kids with two working parents. Don’t be to hard on yourself. It will come. In particularly busy weeks, we give up doing the laundry and housework in favor of going to the park or visiting the children’s museum. My thinking is that no matter what, dirty laundry, dirty dishes, and toys are always going to be making a mess in a house with kids. When I’m feeling my most stressed and pressed for time, that’s when I realize I’m not getting family time. So I walk a way and put them first. I get my family fix and come back to laundry later. Yeah, that means I might have 4 or 5 loads instead of 2 and two loads of dishes. But they are only home for a short 18 years. I’ll have time for clean houses when I have an empty nest! 🙂